Light at the end of the tunnel.

The last few weeks have been both difficult and rewarding in the bohemian household. My baby girl has had colic. For any parent who's child has suffered with colic, i know that just reading that word will put dread into their hearts. It's something my first daughter thankfully never suffered with, and something i had never witnessed before.

The colic starts to rear it's ugly head around about six in the evening and reaches full force by ten. It starts off with my baby girl just being a bit fidgety and not really wanting to go to sleep. By ten she is practically purple in the face, screaming the place down. When she is having a seriously bad night like this, there seems to be nothing in the world i can do to make it better. If i try to sit her on my knee to wind her she gets worse, if i hold her close and rub her back to try to get the wind up she fights me, grabbing and thrashing about as if she's angry that i'm trying to help her, if i put her down again she gets really upset because i'm not cuddling her. The only thing i found that calmed her slightly, albeit for about half an hour at a time was to just sit up in bed or on a chair and just hold her to my chest, without trying to wind her.

I've changed her bottles for some seriously high tech looking anti-colic bottles, (i should never have given up breastfeeding, but that's another story). I have also changed her formula milk to soya formula and have been giving her week fennel tea. Things seem to have improved considerably. She doesn't have so many bad nights now and when she does have a bad night it doesn't last for so long. She has also stopped being so sick and seems to be a much happier baby.
I'm so glad we seem to be coming to the end of the colic phase. During the particularly painful spells of colic, my little girl was regularly still screaming at four in the morning. One night she was screaming and unsettled until seven the next morning, poor little thing. None of us got much sleep that night!

On the up side my two year old's potty training is going very well. Thank you everyone for your tips and support on this subject. She is now in 'big girl' knickers and regularly takes herself to the potty, which means i don't have to keep asking her quite so much.
The only trouble is, after less than a week of potty training, she announced to me that she didn't want to wear a nappy a night and point blank refused to wear one! This means that i 'lift' her once before i go to bed and then again when my husband gets up to go to work at 3.30am, (no i still haven't had a key cut).
So far there have only been two accidents when she hasn't quite made it through to 3.30am but generally she's doing amazingly. I didn't for one minute think that she wouldn't want to wear a nappy at night, but then i suppose if she's being a 'big girl' during the day, then she'd want to be a 'big girl' at night. Thankfully i've got a mattress protector that i've put over her mattress, so if she does wet the bed then it doesn't go through to the mattress but i do get an extra companion in bed hogging my pillows and covers!

So there we have it, things are definitely on the up! Next stop mashed up baby food and the arrival of my two year old's 'big bed'!

Changing faces!

My baby girl, whilst sitting in her little chair, was blowing bubbles and gurgling to anyone who cared to listen. I was hovering around our bedroom and my two year old was following Mummy around the bedroom like a mini me, with her own toddler size hoover.
I looked over to my baby girl and smiled at my rosy cheeked wonder, how happy she looked rewarding me with a gummy grin. I then turned round to check on my other little lady to find her muttering to herself, making sure Mummy didn't miss any dust!
I carried on with the task in hand, but after a few moments i had the urge to look at my two year old again, only to find that my gaze wasn't returned by my little helper but with a sunshine smile from a little Maori girl. Her dark eyes danced with joy at my acknowledgment, her hair held back with a coloured head band that went across her forehead and her little button nose slightly broader than that of my daughter. I returned her smile and stood looking in awe as her aura just seemed to shine.
It was only a few moments, maybe not even a minute, but right there and then, time just seemed to stand still. Before i knew it she went as quickly as she had arrived.

Some people see spirit just like you would see any other person if you were walking down the street, some see them in their minds eye, but some, like me, see them in the faces of others.
The first time i ever saw spirit in another person's face, i was having my first meal out with my husband, when we first started dating. We were chatting quite happily, getting to know a little more about one another when after glancing down for a few seconds i looked up again only to be greeted by a young oriental gentleman smiling back at me. I was slightly stunned but managed to be polite enough to return the young gentleman's smile. Needless to say i didn't tell my husband until a few months later, thankfully he didn't think me strange and instead found it all rather interesting.

I have to say that i have never been frightened by the experience of seeing faces change. That's not to say that if a spirit was to walk in here right now i wouldn't feel slightly uneasy. I'm quite happy to stick to the method of seeing spirit that i'm used to. Maybe one day i'll even feel happy enough to progress to sitting next to one and having a full conversation!

Music to compliment the rain!

Here in Norfolk it has been raining since last night. Not just a little bit of rain either but "big old fat rain" as Forest Gump would say. What better music to listen to whilst watching the heaven's opening outside, but J.S. Bach's Toccata and Fugue in D Minor. It always reminds me of a storm that's brewing. The piece begins with the small raindrops, then you feel the storm clouds building and threatening an almighty storm, but then all subsides with the Sun bursting through the clouds and bringing with it great warmth. A powerful piece of music which always makes the hairs on my neck stand up and giant goosebumps rise on my arms. It's a long piece of music, nearly ten minutes long, but stick with it. For me, it's one of the most powerful pieces of music ever written. I chose the Fantasia version as not only do you get the power, you also get a great visual display to go with it, particularly at the end when the beautiful bright light bursts through the darkness! Enjoy!

The morning after the night before!

What a night we had in cyberspace last night!

Willow hosted the most amazing cyber ball, with an incredible guest list and fantastic food. Willow herself wore the most beautiful gown and was the perfect hostess.

We all ate, drank and danced the night away with some fantastic dance partners, before watching lanterns being released into the night sky.

If you didn't attend the ball last night you should go over to Willow's blog to see how much fun we all had. Talk is, Willow will be hosting another ball again next year, i'm looking forward to it already!

Mummy's going potty!!

Yesterday we had a small breakthrough. Just before her bath time i decided to try to persuade my two year old to sit on her potty. Normally she will either give me a very determined NO, sit on the potty fully clothed, or take her nappy off and sit on it for all of two seconds, before escaping the potty zone and running off at breakneck speed.This time however she managed to sit on it longer than normal, even having a very short conversation about my brother and family who had come to bring her a present that day. She then stood up and announced that she had done a wee, and to my delight she had achieved just that, barely a dribble but still there.
I thought that as it had been her first achievement i should give her lots of praise to encourage future sittings on the potty, so i phoned Grandma and Grandad. They were of course very pleased, after talking about getting her potty trained for what seems like months.
This probably sounds very boring to some of you reading this but this is my first attempt at potty training a child. I've house trained a puppy but not a child. This is also my little girl, so all motherly emotions are involved, plus peer pressure to potty train before she learns to change her own nappy! I was also incredibly proud of her for finally managing to reach the goal that we've been aiming for.
Today however was a very different story.
Whilst getting my girls dressed, my two year old told me that she didn't want to wear her nappy today, she instead wanted to wear her pull up, big girl pants. (Her pull up pants are made of terry toweling with a built in waterproof liner). I agreed to her request so long as she let me know when she needed the potty.
We all finished getting dressed then started to muck the house out, me asking my little lady every 10 minutes if she needed the potty and sitting her on it just in case.
My husband then came in from the garden, to ask if i wanted to go out this afternoon to get some more supplies from the nappy lady, to which i replied yes. He then went back outside to the disappointment of my two year old. "Pleeeeeeessssssse Mummy can i go and help Daddy?" "I'll just check with Daddy", i told her. Daddy said she could help, so i got her coat and wellies on and went outside to find Daddy, little hand in my own right hand and potty in my left!
I asked my husband if he could make sure he kept asking our two year old if she needed to go, and to encourage her to sit down.
Leaving him in charge i went back to the house and finished tidying up. I had just finished the housework, (not much to do today, yeah!), when i heard my little girl crying outside. I went outside to see what was wrong, and was told by my husband that she got upset because she wanted to have a ride in the wheelbarrow on the way to the bonfire, as well as the way back. I asked if she had done a wee to which my husband replied, "oh yes lots, just not in the potty." The poor little thing was soaked, so i got her fresh pull up's and trousers and asked Daddy to sit her on the potty next time, and not to just take her word for it when she said she didn't need to go.
They both came in for lunch, then we all got changed ready to go to pick up supplies from the nappy lady. I decided to put a nappy on my little girl in case she fell asleep in the car and wet the seat, as that wouldn't have been very good for any of us.
We got our supplies and headed back home with two sleeping girls in the car. After we had arrived home and had unpacked our supplies, i persuaded my little girl to sit on the potty again. She sat on it for a little while before hopping off and running into the other room to get her toys. She came back with her baby doll and fitted her with the new doll size reusable nappy we had bought for her. She then stood up to show me and wee'd on the floor. I was mildly annoyed but told her not to worry but that she must sit down on the potty next time. So we got her cleaned up and she carried on playing, with Mummy every 10 minutes asking if she needed the potty, and sitting her down just in case.
I was just doing the washing up when i heard a little voice say "potty, oh dear, clean pants please Mummy." I turned round to see my little girl standing there with very wet pants. Again i tried not to get to annoyed, cleaned her up and carried on as before. This time i though i left the pants off, as i wondered if she just hadn't got to the potty in time, and wearing no pants may make it easier for her. She went off into the sitting room, and a couple of minutes later she came back in saying "oh dear Mummy, wee wee." By this point i was starting to loose my patience a bit but tried to stay calm in front of her. She did it another two times before i got really annoyed and decided to leave her in the sitting room with Daddy and her baby sister, while i stewed in my own juices in the kitchen.
Maybe she's just not ready yet, or maybe i'm not teaching her correctly? I have to admit i don't really know how to teach her to use the potty.
I've felt quite a bit of pressure from various people to potty train my daughter. They probably didn't realised or even mean to put any pressure on me, but it just feels like it when they're telling me that their child is practically out of nappies, and is younger than my little girl. I try not to listen to them, and keep telling myself that she'll get the hang of it one day, and know exactly what to do, and won't want to wear nappies anymore. It's just hard not to listen to them.

So if anyone has managed to get to the end of this post without falling asleep through boredom, (you can wake up now), and has any tips for me, i will be eternally grateful.

Maybe i will just give it another week before trying the potty thing again!

Happy Birthday my little lady!

Yesterday my little girl turned two. I can barely believe that two years have passed. Where does the time go?

After getting my birthday girl and her sister fed and watered, we settled down to the very important job of opening presents and cards. My little girl was very excited that she had so many cards to open and studied each one in great detail. Isn't it lovely how children can be so satisfied with a simple card and envelope that they can open by themselves, something to keep. If only we could all hold on to that appreciation and remember it when we are adults.
My birthday girl also had some small presents to open before we all got ready to go out in the car. A car ride or walk is just as good a present to her, as anything you'd ever be able to wrap up.

Our car journey took us to visit my Nanny in the home she now lives in. It's a home specifically designed for the blind. Although my Nanny's sight is very good for someone of her age (she's 88 next week), my uncle who lived with her, is blind. It was arranged that they could go to live in this specific home so that they would still be together. They each have there own rooms but get to eat together at meal times and spend time together in the day room.
We met my Mum (Grandma) and Dad (Grandad) at the home, to my daughter's delight.

It was lovely to see my Nanny as i hadn't seen her for a very long time, it's probably been two or three years which is really bad of me i know.
One of my Aunty's was visiting as well. It was lovely to see her too and catch up on lost time.
I introduce my Nanny to my little girls, which seemed to stir up memories for her. She is a mother of seven, including one set of twins!
She told us of the times she would visit her mother on the bus with the twins. "I used to have my bag in one hand and a baby in each arm. I'd have to pass one baby to the bus driver while i got my money out of my bag to pay him, then he'd passed the baby back to me so i could go and sit down. I'd have four buses to catch you know, two on the way there and two on the way home." She's amazing, i have no idea how she managed to cope with seven children.

After visiting my Nanny we went on to visit another Aunty and Uncle. We stayed with them for a little while to catch up on the family gossip before heading back home.

We arrived home to be greeted by my husband with an annoyed look on his face. "I don't like the sound the hoover is making", he said. Bless him, he'd been tidying up while we'd been away and had been doing some hoovering. At the moment the hoover makes a strange popping sound which makes it sound like it could go bang at any moment.
He walk passed us, hoover in hand, heading towards the old grain store which is now a work shed come storage room. We went inside and phoned my Mother in law (Granny) and sister in law, niece and baby nephew to let them know that we were back from our travels so that they could come and visit the birthday girl.
They arrived shortly after the phone call with presents and birthday cake in hand. The reason they arrived so quickly is because they literally live at the top of the garden.
We all sat down and watched the delighted look on the birthday girl's face as she open more cards and presents. Daddy then came back in with black hands and told me he thought the hoover may have had it. Never mind, something to sort out on a different day.
I lit the candles on the cake and we all sang Happy Birthday, then watched my little girl blow the candles out, kindly helped by her cousin.
We all had a slice of cake and cup of tea and watched the older children playing with the new toys, while the babies sat and chatted to each other in their own special language.

That evening in the bath my birthday girl talked about her day, going through each new face that she had seen and each new present she had received.
I then snuggled both my girls up in their beds and kissed them good night. It wasn't long before they were both asleep and dreaming of presents, cards, cake and car journey's.

That night i lay in bed, amazed at how fate leads us to our destiny. Three and a half years ago i was in a very different place. Lonely and wondering if i'd ever get the chance to have a family. I never dreamed that i'd be here with my wonderful husband by my side and two beautiful girls. A family to call my very own.

Postcard from the North Norfolk Coast

We arrived at my parents house yesterday afternoon, just before tea time. They have very generously agreed to let us use their house as a base for our weeks holiday. Anything that means they can see more of their Grand-daughters is a bonus in their book, and for us, it means that we get baby sitters, should we choose to have an evening for just the two of us.

Today we decided to venture into Cromer. We parked the car and set off on our journey with our little girl in her buggy and the babe held close to my chest in her sling.

We strolled down the promenade breathing in great lung fulls of fresh salty air, a light breeze dancing round us as the sun pushed her way through the parting clouds, lending us some of her warmth.

We took the children for a wander around the pier, stopping only to talk to a kind looking gentleman hoping to get a bite on his fishing rod. "What are you hoping to catch?", we asked. "Bass", came the reply as he loaded another mackerel onto the hook. "It's not high tide until six", he said. "That's the best time". Blimey i though, he's got a while to wait, seeing as it was only lunchtime! The gentleman looked happy and relaxed as though he had all the time in the world. It's such a wonderful way to view life, people are in to much of a rush these days but unfortunately that seems to have become the way of the world.

We went on our way, stopping only to view some wonderful paintings by a local artist. He had captured some wonderful scenes on canvas, of the sea, with incredible sky's and beautiful cloud formations as the backdrops.

We popped into a cafe for a quick sandwich before heading back to the car. We let our little lady stretch her legs with a hill climb along the path towards the car park, her little hand finding comfort and companionship within her Daddy's own hand.

She is now sound asleep, happily drifting along in dream land. The baby however is only just settling down again after needing some more comforting cuddles and a small top up. She's started teething early would you believe, at not yet 13 weeks. The classic signs including, nappy rash, chewing frantically on her fists, even when i can assure you she is not hungry, and incredibly hot rosy cheeks. It doesn't surprise me she's started early, her sister did the same. You see it runs in the family. My husband was born with two front teeth, and i had a full set by the time i was a year old!

The arrival at my parents is always tinged with mixed emotion. Happiness at seeing my parents but also sadness...

We turned into the driveway as we have done on countless occasions. My first instinct is always to want to say to my husband "make sure you slow down going up the drive". Of course i never say this out loud, as i know that the conversation would go a little like this....

"Sweetheart make sure you drive nice and slowly up the driveway won't you". "Why"? would come my husband's response. "Well you know how excited Dotty dog gets when we get here". (She's a beautiful white Jack Russell with black patches and little dots on her tummy).

I always see her bounding down the drive towards us, that little smile on her face, her eye's lit up with pleasure at seeing her "Mummy" home again.

My husband would turn to face me his hand resting on mine. "Darling", he'd say. "Dotty dog passed three years ago." Of course i already know this, but i still see her every time. And she still sleeps curled up at the end of my bed, just like she always did.